In 2021, I decided to pick one word to define the upcoming year. For me, the word grew organically, though I had heard of others consciously selecting one word to guide them, using their term in vision boards and goal setting. I lay no claim to the originality of this idea, but since I have discovered it, I have found that it gives me a lot of purpose and joy as I think about the year ahead.

2021: Renaissance

Renaissance defined my 2021. I was teaching on a hybrid schedule, and our school department had Work from Home Wednesdays (what I wouldn’t give to get those back). I found that I had more free time, as the world around me was forced to slow, and I with it. I started painting, sketching, and trying to implement more beauty into my life. I reclaimed my love of reading through nature walks with audiobooks and joining the BookTok community. I hadn’t been able to share such excitement over books since I was a kid reading Harry Potter as they came out each year. I read a personal record of seventy four books, over the previous year’s forty three, and liked making videos about my favorite reads and tropes. 

That year of forced repose allowed me to cultivate my creativity purposefully. I had energy left at the end of the day to dedicate to these pursuits. I also was making huge progress in therapy, learning to love myself and process years of trauma. Once I was able to put some of those burdens down, I had room to nurture more passion into my life. 

My most significant and life-changing undertaking was to write my first book. Writing was something I had always kind of thought about doing, but never really tried. When I was in 8th grade, I had a green composition notebook that I used to take to the beach for our family day trips. I wrote a fantasy novel about dragons. It was very bad, and I only made it to chapter eight before abandoning it. In 2014, I signed up for NaNoWriMo with no idea of what to write or how to go about it. The desire to write had always been there, but I had never seriously sat down to write A Novel. But I’d had an idea about a girl who used magic to escape an arranged marriage, set in Regency London, floating around for the better part of three years. I finally decided to write it down. For myself, if no one else. 

What I ended up with was a monster of a first draft, coming in at about 153k. I hired an editor, completely unsure of where to go from there. She kindly informed me that I had written two books in a very thorough, yet affirming, editorial letter. She taught me so much about writing, and I set to work on revisions.

2022: The Age of Enlightenment

I know, it’s technically not one word, but I think of these titles as more eras (à la Taylor Swift) than a strict adherence to one appellation. And I have a flair for the dramatic.

Last year was dedicated to the pursuit of knowledge. I wrote a young adult book. So, what was I supposed to do with it? I attended virtual writing conferences, chatted with agents who gave realistic advice, and found a wonderful community of writers on Twitter. I sent my first query letter, which was also very bad. (Dear agent, I am so sorry.) I learned how to write better queries and pitches. I read books on the craft, and talked to experts, and absorbed all I could about how to craft a book worth reading. I sent 100 queries, received four partial requests and eight fulls, and just as many passes. Though I still have one full request out there, and many agents have asked me to query again with future projects.

I stopped self-rejecting and threw myself into a wide variety of writing pursuits. I entered the NYC Flash Fiction Challenge and wrote short stories, making it to the penultimate round, which I never thought possible. I applied to be on a TV pilot for a show called America’s Next Great Author, and was selected to go to Newark, New Jersey to film. I met so many wonderful people there, and acquired such a profound respect for those who dared to try this wild writing thing. I submitted stories to lit magazines, and have been encouraged to keep writing, keep trying, keep submitting.

After three years in therapy, I felt so much more optimistic and stable about my mental health, though I still have things to work on. My physical health was improving, as I was now recovered from a debilitating knee surgery in 2020 (tibial tubercle osteotomy, if you’re curious). I made a lot of growth in setting boundaries and sticking to them. I made progress.

2023: The Revolution

I am so excited for this year. I have such a clear vision for what I want, and am ready to discard the things that do not serve me. This year, I will not be doing things for other people, just to please them or conform to an idea of what I think they expect from me. I will stand up for what I believe in, and advocate for myself and others. I will exercise because it makes me feel better, not because society says I should be thinner and weigh less.  

Two weeks ago, I started cello lessons. I played the viola when I was in elementary school, and have always wanted to learn to play the cello. This year, I will continue to make space for new creative pursuits and explore the things that bring me joy.

I will write because I want to, and am ready to take all of the things I learned last year and apply them to my craft. I am still waiting for my one publishing “yes” from anywhere, but I feel very optimistic about this year. While I do hope to get an agent, I also hope to be published in a literary magazine. I hope to self-publish my adult fantasy romance novel, a self-indulgent blend of Moulin Rouge and Crescent City. I will also finish my new young adult project, a Gothic haunted house story set at the turn of the century in a rendition of coastal Maine. 

These goals may not seem very revolutionary, but to me they are a rejection of expectations, both self-imposed and societal.  

My theme for the year also encompasses my feelings about our current society. I am fed up with capitalism, our fixation on greed and profit, and the blatant disregard for women’s rights. I am sick of hate towards others, the toxicity of our do-more culture, of the inequity and injustices that are built into the very structures of our education and governing systems. The dismissal of mental health, especially in teachers, while preaching superficial self-care. 

There is not a lot that I can do, as one person, to change these things. But I can write about girls who find power despite their circumstances, and stories of my own truth. I can give books to students, provide them with windows and doors to see themselves build empathy towards others. 

And that can be a little revolutionary.

Image credits for Vision Board, from top left to right
1: fitness https://www.pinterest.com/pin/6825836926812908/
2: coffee shop Cidney Mayes
3: woods https://www.pinterest.com/pin/6825836926812895/
4: hair https://www.pinterest.com/pin/6825836926813820/
5: fitness equipment Canva
6: black outfit https://www.pinterest.com/pin/6825836926812878/
7: money https://www.pinterest.com/pin/6825836926812914/
8: cello Canva
9: London https://www.pinterest.com/pin/6825836926812889/
10: writing materials https://www.pinterest.com/pin/6825836926812862/
11: writer quote https://www.pinterest.com/pin/6825836926812856/
12: sunrise https://www.pinterest.com/pin/6825836926812925/
13: book signing https://www.pinterest.com/pin/6825836926813794/
14: eye makeup https://www.pinterest.com/pin/6825836926813793/